|NITAAI-Veda.nyf > Spiritual Questions & Answers > Pre-2007 QnA Swami Gaurangapada > Question|
User: neilsf††† Date: 2006-07-21 17:27:20
Nityananda! Gauranga! Hare Krishna!
All Glories To Swami Gaurangapada and the devotees!
Dear Swami Gaurangapada: I humbly bow down to your lotus feet again and again. The lotus feet of the guru are my only shelter.
I'm somewhat embarrassed to ask this question, because I'm afraid that it sounds silly, how do I develop a relationship Nityananda and Gauranga with pure love?
I've been reading the Chaitanya Bhagavat and although I know that all of Shri Chaitanya's associates are eternally pure devotees and I am eternally impure, I can't help noticing how in pure love with Gauranga everybody is in the Chaitanya Bhagavata, and how Gauranga reciprocates and fills everyone's heart with His pure love.
I really want to experience pure love like that. Is this desire for pure love for the Lord just a material desire? I know that in the material world, there are people who love me and that I love, but I always feel that in the material world, no matter how "strong" the love is there is always "something" lacking.
I really believe that only God's love and love of God can provide that "fullness" of love that I seek. But I'm just not experiencing it. I chant and I do feel some happiness when I chant, but I just have a feeling that there is so much more that isn't happening.
I want to love Nityananda and Gauranga and I know that they want to love me, so what am I doing wrong? Or am I just caught up in material desire? Am I trying to be more than I am? Am I being presumptuous to even think about this? I know I'm just a beginer, but I just feel so "empty" and I know that only God can give me "fullness." Part of me suspects that your answer will be to just chant the Holy Names and I don't necessarily disagree with that, but what's it going to take? How much work am I going to have to do to get the love from God that I need? Is this desire real, or is it just a desire for material feeling?
Maybe its because of all my negative karma and sinfulness that prevents me from experiencing Nityananda and Gauranga's love. But if that's the case, aren't Nityananda and Gauranga the most merciful to fallen and sinful souls?
Maybe my expectations are wrong? Am I looking for something that I think is love but isn't really?
I humbly submit myself at your feet and I pay repeated obeisances to the assembled devotees as well
Title: Re: Question
User: Nitaipada_Maharaja†† Date: 2006-07-24 04:40:14
Nityananda!† Gauranga!† Hare Krishna!† All glories to Shrila Prabhupada and all Vaishnavas.† Please accept my humble obeisances and blessings.† I pray that this meets you well and in the service/mercy of Shri Guru and Shri Guarnaga.
My Dearest Bhakta Neil;
As we begin our journey in Krishna Consciousness, Maya places many obstacles in our path to discourage us from reaching out for the lotus feet of the Lord.† One of the greatest manipulations of Maya is to use our own emotions against us.† The feelings of fear, lonliness, solitude, rejection and emptiness are all used against one that is beginning so as to discourage that young devotee from devotional service.
Where have you started in your studies.† About reading,† Shrila Gaurangapada has a list of books that should be studied for the new devotee, and in following his guidelines it makes our understanding much more fulfilled and complete.† You can find Shrila Gaurangapada's "Holy Book Reading Sequence" here at: http://www.gaurangapada.org/reading/1159-holy-books-readings-sequence.html
Do not become discouraged in your chanting.† You must continue to strive to complete your rounds of atleast the Mantra-Rajas daily.† But there are also other items in our daily life that must meet up with standards for the devotee.
1.† Follow the Four Regulative Principles:
2.† You should strive to serve the Deities atleast twice a day. This means that you have to get up early and start your rounds, prepare Them a small breakfast and dress Them nicely for the day.† At evening, you should do the same, and put Them to bed at around 9 pm.
3.† We benefit greatly through our personal association with advanced devotees,† so try to get that if possible.
I live in West Linn, Oregon, if you would like to talk, please contact me through the private messenger and we can talk about the Lord and any difficulties that you may be having.
Your eternal servant;
Title: Re: Question
User: Swami Gaurangapada Date: 2006-07-28 09:16:55
Nityananda! Gauranga! Hare Krishna! Jaya Guru Parampara! Pranams! :pranams: and Blessings! :bless: Just try to chant, read and perform Bhakti and Naam yoga for the pleasure of the Lord alone and no other motivations. Do it for His pleasure even if you don't feel like doing it for yourself. Seeing us selflessly working for His pleasure, the Lord will then give you the bliss which you are seeking for. Just like the saying goes...no gain without pain...so the Lord wants to see that we are serving Him for His sake not our own sake and then He will surely bestow His mercy upon us.