| NITAAI-Veda.nyf > Other Scriptures by Acharyas > Shyamananda Prakash |
SHRI
SHYAMANANDA PRAKASH
By
Shrila Krishnadasa
CHAPTER
1
All glories to Shri Chaitanya and
Nityananda Prabhu. All glories toAdvaitacandra, and all the devotees of
Mahaprabhu.
I worship the feet of Shri Gauridas
Pandit Thakur. Like a dog, I eagerly wait to eat the remnants of his food life
after life. Iworship Shri Nityananda and Shri Chaitanya, taking refuge under
Their lotus feet.
Once Gauridas Pandit Thakur, the
spiritual master of Hrdayananda Goswami (Hrdaya Chaitanya Thakura), bestowed his
mercy upon Shri Shyamananda by ordering him to go to Vraja. Upon receiving this instruction Shyamananda
immediately became indifferent to the affairs of this material world. He eagerly approached his guru, Hrdayananda
Deva, requesting permission to leave for Vraja at once. His spiritual master kindly consented and
Shyamananda left for Vrndavana.
Shri Shyamananda Goswami settled in
Vraja, living with Shri Jiva Goswami, who was very affectionate towards
him. Shyamananda spent his days and
nights listening to the rasa-lila of Shri Radha Krishna, tasting the essence of
its madhurya rasa. Totally absorbed in
these loving pastimes, he completely forgot all bodily demands.
He fully engaged in the service of
Kanaka Kunja (grove), cleaning and worshiping it every morning. He served the
lotus feet of Shri Jiva and spent the rest of his time hearing the pastimes of
Radha Krishna.
Once, while listening to such
pastimes, his mind became so deeply absorbed in divine love that he fell
unconscious in the kunja. It appeared
that his breathing had stopped and no signs of life were visible in his
body. Seeing him in this condition Shri
Jiva was panic-stricken. Lifting the
body of Shyamananda, Jiva quickly carried him to his house. A long twenty seven hours passed before
Shyamananda regained consciousness and sat up.
He then fell at the feet of Shri Jiva, took the dust from his lotus feet
and placed it on his head. Greatly relieved, Shri Jiva happily offered
Syamananda prasadam.
Cherishing a hope within his mind, Shyamananda
asked Shri Jiva, “Oh Goswami, kindly fulfill my desire. Please tell me how I can attain the mercy of
Radha Krishna.”
Shri Jiva lovingly advised
Shyamananda, explaining the five types of rasa, particularly the madhurya
rasa. Inspired by Shyamananda’s
submissiveness, Shri Jiva went on to explain frankly that bhava and bhavasraya
are the same. These explanations fully satisfied the heart of Shyamananda. Shri Jiva then instructed Shyamananda
regarding the practice of austerities and the methods of raganuga worship.
By the mercy of Jiva Goswami, who had
taken shelter of Shri Rupa, Shyamananda began worshiping Radha Krishna
continuously. Day by day he became
increasingly absorbed in devotional service. His mind was inspired (uddipana)
by love (raga) and he fell into a trance of spontaneous devotion. With his
body, mind and words he engaged in the service of Radha Krishna and the
kunja. He was always preoccupied with
the thought of observing the divine pastimes of Radha Krishna. Externally, he expertly practiced religious
austerities, while internally he lovingly served their Lordships, along with
Shri Rupamanjari.
Inside the Kalpa Kunja Kutir in
Vrndavana, Radha Krishna daily perform rasa-lila. Those who are not qualified are unable to
perceive this reality, but see only the illusory energy of the Lord.
One day Radha and Krishna, along with
their sakhis, were dancing and singing joyfully within the kunja. Holding one anothers hands Radha and her
sakhis made a circle around Krishna. They danced delightfully, and Krishna,
whose beauty charms Cupid himself, danced along with them while other sakhis
sang and played musical instruments.
When Shri Radha danced, Krishna
observed with great joy. Sometimes she danced, and other times she enjoyed
watching her sakhis dance. The
perfection of the eyes is to see these divine amusements, which are all meant
for the pleasure of Krishna. While
Radhika danced on and on, unknowingly, one of Her ankle bells (nupura) became
loose and fell on the ground. Neither She,
nor Her sakhis, noticed it. After dancing, Radha and Krishna went to bed and
relished loving pastimes throughout the night, as the sakhis observed through
the windows. Upon awaking at dawn, the
sakhis requested Radha Krishna to get up from bed. After some time Radha reluctantly arose.
Fearful of the chastisement of Her relatives She quickly started for her house.
The sakhis also returned to their homes, unaware of the lost ankle bell. Shri Radha had planned this incident just to
show Her mercy to Shyamananda.
In the morning Shyamananda Goswami
went to perform his regular daily service to the kunja. He took darshan, paid his obeisances, and
began cleaning under the desire tree (kalpataru). There he found the golden ankle bell of
Shrimati Radharani.
The entire surface of the kunja was
glowing due to the ankle bells effulgence.
Its brightness overshadowed the glittering of a golden mirror. It seemed as if the sun itself had appeared
there personally. Seeing this,
Shyamananda fainted on the spot. Sometime passed before he regained
consciousness, then taking the ankle bell in his hand he placed it on his
head. Immediately his throat choked up
with emotion and all the symptoms of ecstasy appeared in his body. Overwhelmed
with love, he kissed the ankle bell and clasped it to his heart, then again
fell unconscious on the ground of the kunj.
After considerable time he again came
to his senses and began calling the names of Radha Krishna. Running frantically here and there he
searched for their Lordships. Unable to
find them, he was filled with distress.
Mad with love, he cried out desperately, “When shall I see Radha
Krishna.” Eventually he pacified
himself, tied the anklebell around his neck, and continued cleaning the kunj.
Meanwhile, after entering her room,
Radha was perturbed to find one of Her ankle bells missing. Thinking that she
may have dropped it in the kunja, She ordered Lalita to go there and search for
it. Lalita Sundari, in the disguise of
an old lady hurried to the kunj.
Upon seeing Shyamananda, Lalita asked
his name, and he replied “Dukhini Krishnadasa”.
“Have you seen the ankle bell of my daughter-in-law?” Lalita
inquired. 'She came to the Jamuna to fetchwater
and due to Her carelessness one of Her precious golden anklebells fell from Her
foot in this kunj. If you have found it
please return it and I will gladly reward you.”
“Tell me frankly”, Goswami asked,
“Where do you live and what is your name?”
“I am Radha dasi”, Lalita replied,
concealing her identity. “I belong to a Kanoj brahmana family of Vraja.”
Hearing this Goswami admitted,
“Thakurani, I did find an ankle bell, but it cannot be yours. It must belong to Shri Radha, because the
moment I touched the ankle bell I felt as if I was falling deep into the ocean
of love of God. My heart swelled with
ecstatic love and I fell unconscious. No
ordinary ankle bell could induce such feelings. Now listen to me, this ankle
bell surely belongs to Shri Radha. If you insist that it belongs to you I will
certainly return it, but first I want to see where you live. I will show the
ankle bell to the inhabitants of your village and they must identify it as
yours. If they will act as your witnesses, I will immediately give it back.
Otherwise I shall wear it myself until I am able to return it to the feet of
the rightful owner.”
Hearing this, Lalita finally
confessed, “You are right. I have tried to deceive you. This ankle bell certainly belongs to Shrimati
Radharani. I am very pleased with you,
ask any boon for yourself and I will happily grant it, afterwards I will take
the ankle bell. The daughter of
Vrsabhanu will also be extremely pleased with you for finding Her ankle bell.”
Goswami earnestly replied, “O
Thakurani, I must know your real identity.
Only after you have revealed your true self to me will I ask my boon.
Taking Goswami to a secluded place
Lalita confessed, “I am Lalita, a maidservant of Shri Radha. Listen to me Duhkini Krishna das, you are
anxious to see my real form, but such a revelation will certainly be too much
for you to bear.”
“By your mercy anything is possible,”
he protested. Submitting to his desire Lalita agreed, “Alright Krishna das, I
shall reveal my real self. Close your eyes.”
Goswami shut his eyes, then Lalita
ordered, “Look at me Krishna das.” Opening his eyes Goswami witnessed the
extraordinary beauty of Lalita. Overwhelmed with ecstasy he fell on the ground
unconscious. Shri Lalita devi lovingly helped him to come to his senses, and
Goswami bowed to her feet with tears in his eyes. Holding the feet of Lalita on
his head he smeared the dust from her lotus feet over his entire body. Fully under the control of divine love, he
cried incessantly, unable to speak a word.
Seeing his state of mind, Lalita
gently touched his body, pacifying him.
Satisfied by Goswami’s devotional sentiments, Lalita said, “Krishna das
ask any type of boon from me.””I have nothing to ask for”, Goswami said. “I
only want to be your servant and in this way serve Radha Krishna.”
Lalita kindly fulfilled his desire
saying, “You shall certainly attain the association of Radha Krishna, but you
cannot serve their Lordships in this feature.
You must prepare yourself mentally as a confidante of Radha to have her
darshan. Come with Shri Rupamanjarit o
the kunj and observe the rasalila of Radha Krishna. Then you can witness all of our true
identities. For the remainder of this
life stay with Shri Jiva and go on tasting the essence of the rasalila. At the end of your life you will attain the
lotus feet of Shri Radhika. Now, accept this eternal mantra of Radha Krishna. Whenever you chant this mantra you will be
able to see their Lordships."” Showering her mercy upon him, Lalita gave
Goswami the mantra practiced by herself. Immediately upon reciting the mantra
within the kunj pure love arose within the mind of Goswami. Filled with joy he fell at the feet of
Lalita. She put her feet on his head,
then taking him on her lap, blessed him heartily.
Goswami then went to a particular spot
in the kunja where he had previously cleared the grass and dug a hole using a
small spade. In that hole he had hidden the ankle bell, along with the spade,
covering them with a cloth. Upon
removing the cloth he found that the spade had been transformed into gold by
the touch of the anklebell. Delighted,
Goswami brought the ankle bell to Lalita carrying it on his head. He place it before her and fell prostrate on
the ground offering obeisances.
Taking the ankle bell in her hand
Lalita Sundari quickly placed it to Goswami’s head saying, “Let the touch of
Shri Radhika’s feet be on your head.”
Again she touched the ankle bell to his forehead, suddenly two vertical
lines appeared on his forehead, and from the touch of the pinnacle of the ankle
bell a dot appeared in the middle of the tilak.
Goswami fell on the ground bowing to
the feet of Lalitadevi. “From today”, Lalita said, “You will be known by the
name Shyamananda. Having attained the mercy of the lotus feet of Shyama (Radha)
you have become extremely fortunate. Now
return to your kunj and do not tell anyone, except Shri Jiva about this
incident, otherwise you will not live long.”
Overwhelmed with love Goswami again
bowed before Lalita, crying helplessly.
Lalita consoled him and took her leave. She walked a fewsteps, then
suddenly disappeared from the kunj.
Goswami frantically began roaming from
kunj to kunj crying loudly, “Where is Lalita.”
Filled with ecstatic love he eventually returned to his kunj and fell at
the feet of Shri Jiva Goswami.
By the touch of Shri Lalita, the
complexion of Shyamananda had been transformed into a wonderful golden color.
His beauty had increased to such an extent that the entire world would
certainly be enchanted by his appearance.
“Where have you been for so long”,
Shri Jiva inquired curiously, “and how has your complexion become golden?”
Shyamananda replied, "My lord, I have been in my kunj. It is only by the mercy of your lotus feet
that my complexion has changed.” “You have become so beautiful,” Shri Jiva said
with wonder. “What is that sign on your forehead? Who painted it there? Your body is filled with love and your eyes
are full of tears. Previously you wore tilak like the temple of Shri Hari, who
has given you this new tilak? You are
definitely hiding something from me Shyamananda, but I am not deceived. I know
you have received the mercy of Krishna, or maybe the mercy of Shri Radhika,
because I see the mark of her feet on your forehead. Now you must explain everything to me.”
“It is your mercy which has caused
these tears of love and ecstasy in my body”, Shyamananda insisted. “The mark of
your grace is the tilak on my forehead.
Please show me your mercy so that I may attain the spiritual realm. Syamananda had hidden the golden spade und a
cloth in his room, suddenly Shri Jiva noticed it and inquired: “What is under
that cloth? Show me and I’m sure I will
understand everything. Shyamananda
uncovered the cloth, revealing the golden spade. Astonished, Shri Jiva asked,
“How is it possible that the iron spade has become gold?” “I shall tell you
confidentially,” Shyamananda softly replied, as I was forbidden to tell anyone
except you. Saying this he took Shri
Jiva to a secluded place and whispered the whole story in his ear. Filled with happiness Shri Jiva placed
Shyamananda on his lap saying, “Today I have become your property. Because you have received the favor of the
daughter of Vrsabhanu, you have now become the most fortunate devotee.” Bowing
at the feet of Shri Jiva, Shyamananda lovingly requested him not to reveal this
incident to anyone. “Say only that by the grace of my spiritual master
everything has taken place.” Concealing Shyamananda’s secret, Shri Jiva simply
told everyone that due to the wish of Shyamananda’s guru from now on Krishnadas
would be known as Shyamananda, and his tilak shall be known as
Shyamanandi. “I am a captive of your
love,” Shyamananda told Jiva. “By your mercy I found the ankle bell, and by
your mercy I was able to see Shri Lalitadevi and receive the mantra.” By the
grace of the lotus feet of Shyamananda I received the ability to write this
book. Meditating on Shri Rupamanjari, I
have described the first chapter in a nutshell.
CHAPTER
2
All glories to the lotus feet of
Shyamananda, by his mercy I have been empowered to write this book.
Seeing the golden complextion and
beautiful mark of tilak on Shyamananda’s forehead, the people began to
talk: “By the mercy of Shri Jiva,
Krishnadas has received the name Shyamananda and become famous in
Vrndavana. He is the disciple of Shri
Hrdayananda Goswami, but now he has left his original guru and taken shelter
under the feet of Shri Jiva.”
These conversations amongst the Vrajavasis
came to the ears of all the Vaishnavas.
Criticising Shri Jiva they said:
“How can Shri Jiva do this? He
has accepted Shyamananda as his own disciple.
Is there any law in the scriptures which allows such behavior? Shri Jiva is a great sage, most probably he
has done it unconsciously. If he comes to know what we are discussing certainly
he will respect our opinions”
Others said: “This cannot be done by Jiva Goswami.” Yet all of the Vaishnavas were afraid to
directly question Shri Jiva. Rather, they simply judged him according to the
rumors circulating.
Some Vaishnavas who traveled from
Vraja to Gauda met Hrdayananda Goswami and informed him: “Duhki Krishnadas has
left your refuge and taken shelter at the feet of Shri Jiva Goswami. He has given
Krishnadas the name Shyamananda das, and changed his tilak, calling it
Shyamanandi.”
Hearing this Hrdayananda was furious:
“Shri Jiva has accepted my disciple as his disciple,” he roared. “Neither Chaitanya Mahaprabhu nor Nityananda
Prabhu have ever done such a thing, but now Shri Jiva is proving himself
superior to Them? I shall make him
understand the mistake he has made.”
Saying this he called his disciples
and ordered them: “Five to ten of you go
to Vrndavana, bind up Duhkini Krishnadas and bring him back here to me.
However, if Shri Jiva tries to free him, then leave Krishnadas there in his
care. If this situation arises give my
letter to Jiva Goswami and bring his reply to me. Ask Krishnadas why he has done this. How dare he ignore me and accept another
guru. Ask him if he has attained Krishna
by the mercy of Jiva Goswami. If the
answer is yes, then we shall all go to Shri Jiva and accept him as our
spiritual master also. I have never heard of such behavior amongst the
disciples of Mahaprabhu. These topics are clearly explained inthe scriptures.
“Once Mahaprabhu rejected Chota
Haridas. Bereft of his spiritual master,
Chota Haridas decided to commit suicide by jumping into the Jamuna. This is the
method of Mahaprabhu’s religion. I have
never seen or heard of anything like this. It is explained in the scriptures
that we must reject the association of superficial persons who outwardly pose
as devotees. If I am such a
non-Vaishnava guru then it is good that Krishnadas has left me. I shall arrange
a debate with all the Vaishnavas regarding this matter. If it is proven that I am a non-Vaishnava,
then I shall surely take refuge in Shri Jiva.
Now go to Vrndavana as quickly as possible and bring Shri Jiva’s reply,
then I will understand the truth. If I
am correct, I shall visit all the holy places of Gauda and gather all the
Vaishnavas together, then we will all go to Vrndavana for the judgement.” Saying this he ordered his disciples to leave
for Vrndavana immediately.
After a long journey they finally
reached Vraja and brought the letter to Shri Jiva. Keeping the letter in front
of himself, Shri Jiva paid his sincere obeisances. He embraced all the Vaishnavas and inquired,
“Who has sent this letter?”
“It was written by Hrdayananda
Goswami,” they replied. “Be merciful to
us and read it immediately. Shri Jiva requested them to finish bathing, be
seated and take prasadam. “We have already bathed and eaten,” they replied
abrubtly. “Please read the letter without delay.”
Assuring them that he would read the
letter at once, Shri Jiva insisted that they wash their hands and feet and be
comfortably seated. Accepting the order of Shri Jiva, they washed and took
their seats.
After silently reading the letter,
Shri Jiva smiled and told them: “Listen to me, Hrdayananda Goswami has written
this accusing letter, but I assure you I have not made Krishnadas my
disciple. I respect Hrdayananda as a
great scholar and I am not even qualified to be his disciple. I cannot bear his
anger. Shri Gauridas Pandit Thakur is my spiritual master and has always
affectionately treated me like his servant.
“By the grace of Hrdayananda,
Krishnadas came to Vraja. He stayed with
me in order to relish the topics of Shrimad Bhagavatam. I allowed him to stay here only because it
was the order of his guru. The mind of
Krishnadas has become completely purified by hearing the pastimes of the Lord,
and his respect for his spiritual master has doubled. Love can only be revealed in the heart of one
who is pure. Who has said that
Krishnadas has become my disciple? Bring
him here!”
“Two sannyasis from Vraja came to
Gauda,” they replied, “and reported that Krishnadas had left Hrdayananda and
accepted you as his guru. The Vrajavasis
also say that by your mercy Krishnadas painted the tilak named Shyamanadi and
received his new name, Shyamananda. Hrdayananda was astonished to hear this and
has written this letter to find out the truth.”
“Call everyone together,” Shri Jiva
said. “Now we shall find out whether this
story is true or false. If it is proven
to be true then certainly I am guilty.”
Protesting, the devotees replied: “We
believe you. We want to hear the truth from you only, then we shall report to
Goswami.”
Replying sweetly, Shri Jiva said: “Listen, and I shall tell you
everything. One day I asked Krishnadas,
‘Who has given you this name.?’ He explained to me that by the grace of
Hrdayananda Goswami, he has accepted his new name.”
“Now let me tell you about
Krishnadas. He always serves Radha Krishna
in the kunj, and listens intently to Shrimad Bhagavatam. He chants lakhs of
holy names throughout the day and night.
He regularly takes darshan of Shri Govinda, takes prasadam, and serves
the devotees daily. He constantly sings
the glories of Radha Krishna, always remembering Their eternal pastimes. Krishnadas stays in my kunja and cleans it
daily, absorbed in the service of Radha Krishna. One day Krishnadas had a dream which he
revealed to me. In his dream Hrdayananda
appeared before him while he was busy cleaning the kunj. Krishnadas offered him
a seat made of grass, and Goswami asked Krishnadas what he had been doing.
Krishnadas humbly replied that, according to his order, he was living in Vraja
and serving the kunj, keeping the lotus feet of his spiritual master in his
mind. Hearing this Hrdayananda was very
happy and told Krishnadas that he was extremelyfortunate to be engaged in that
way, as Radha Krishna eternally reside in the kunj. Hrdayananda explained that the great
personalities like Brahma, and other demigods, pray for the precious
opportunity to serve the kunj. Thus he
advised Krishnadas to remain in the kunj and carry on with his duties, in this
way eventually he would have the darshan of Radha Krishna. He told Krishnadas that: “Shyama-Shyam
(Radha-Krishna), being pleased with your service will give you the name
Shyamananda.” Blessing him, he placed
his feet on the head of Krishnadas and immediately a new tilak spontaneously
appeared on his forehead. Hrdayananda
Goswami then circumambulated the kunj and entered into it. From the day that Krishnadas told me this
story I have taken the order of Hrdayananda as supreme, and called Krishnadas,
Shyamananda. Not understanding what
actually took place, the people in general only guessed what had happened.”
The devotees were relieved to hear
this explanation, and happily recorded the words of Shri Jiva in a letter. Shri
Jiva then requested that they confirm this story with Krishnadas.
Coming before them Krishnadas bowed at
their feet and verified the words of Shri Jiva.
“I hold the lotus feet of Hrdayananda Goswami on my head,” Krishnadas
said. “He is my lord and master. It is
his order that I live with the Vaishnavas and associate with the devotees of
Mahaprabhu. While in Vraja, I have spent
many days with Shri Jiva Goswami, listening to Shrimad Bhagavatam and topics
related to Krishna. Shri Hrdayananda Goswami is my last resort and the life of
my life, and I regard Shri Jiva like my guru.
I desire to spend the rest of my life serving Radha Krishna, in the
kunj, and the feet of all theVaishnavas.
I want to have darshan of the kunj daily and serve Shri Vrajamandala,
Shri Govindadev, and Shri Hrdayananda Goswami.
My life, body, and mind are fully absorbed in this ecstacy. By the grace of my guru’s guru (Gauridas
Pandit or Subala Sakha) I am enjoying the pleasure of the darshan of the
Rasasthali. My mind has become soothed by seeing the Yamuna and the Kadamba. My
daily worship and meditation is the lotus feet of Shri Hrdayananda Prabhu. Not knowing this, people have made false
accussations, without proper understanding.
Hearing this, all the devotees happily
embraced Shyamananda. Shri Jiva then fed all the Vaishnavas sumptuous prasadam.
In the morning Jiva gave them a letter for Shri Hrdayananda Goswami, and bade
them farewell. After visiting the sacred
places of Vrndavana, the devotees started for Gauda.
By the grace of the lotus feet of Shri
Shyamananda, I received the ability to write this book. Remembering the lotus feet of Shri Rupamanjari,
I have described the episode of chapter two in short.
CHAPTER
3
Eager to sing the glories of Shri
Shyamananda, I continue writing this book. The devotees first circumambulated
Vraja then happily started their long journey home, carrying the letter of Shri
Jiva. Reaching Gauda, they immediately handed the letter to Hrdayananda.
Goswami read the letter and thoughtfully
considered its contents. “What Shri Jiva
has written may not be correct,” he said. “I cannot understand him. When did I appear in Shyamananda’s dream? I
do not remember such an incident. I have
not given the name Shyamananda. How
absurd that I know nothing about it.
Perhaps, out of fear, Krishnadas has made up this ridiculous story. Are we expected to believe that his dream has
become reality, and what we have witnessed with our own eyes is illusion? These are all deceiving talks. The whole world knows that dreams are
meaningless, no one pays any heed to dreams. This is a trick of Shri Jiva,
surely he has taken my Krishnadas. Now he is afraid of me and has written this
deceiving letter. I shall go to Vrndavana with all of the Vaishnavas and prove
it to everyone.”
In an angry mood he started for Gauda to
request the mahantas to accompany him to Vraja. Along the way Goswami asked his
disciples, “What kind of tilak did you see on the forehead of Krishnadas?” “We
saw the tilak drawn like the temple of Hari, with a dot in the middle of it”,
they replied.
“Jiva has given his own mark,” Goswami
said, “and to avoid the offense he has placed a dot in its middle. The name of that type of tilaka is Shri
Radhavallabhi. Now I know who they are
worshipping, and it is certain that Krishnadas has taken refuge in Shri Jiva.”
Speaking in this way, he entered Gauda
and addressed the mahantas, “Please be kind and accompany me to Vrndavana, as
Krishnadashas ruined my life. If you do
not go I shall commit suicide before you to save my prestige. You can take
advantage of this opportunity to see Vrndavana, and at the same time my purpose
can also be served.”
The Mahantas agreed to go to speak
with Shri Jiva, and taking their chief disciples with them they started for
Vraja. Along the way they passed the
house of Gauridas Thakur and also brought his chief disciple along with them.
After a long journey the mahantas
reached Vrndavana. Arriving at Dhira Samira, near the bank of the Yamuna, they
took bath, cooked,and took prasadam.
Afterwards they blissfully performed nama-sankirtan along the bank of
the Yamuna. Meanwhile Hrdayananda sent
one of his disciple to inform Shri Jiva of their arrival.
Shri Jiva hastily came before the
Vaishnavas and offered his obeisances falling flat on the ground. All the mahantas embraced Shri Jiva. Some of them paid their respects, while
others offered their blessings.
“This is a very auspicious day,” Shri
Jiva said happily. “Although I am the most insignificant person, today I am
blessed with the association of so many great sages. It is certainly a wonderful day for me.”
The mahantas requested Shri Jiva to be
seated and inquired about his well-being. “There are always waves of happiness
flowing in Vraja,” Shri Jiva replied.
Because Radha Krishna perform Their pastimes here the atmosphere is
surcharged with spiritual bliss, thus Vrndavana is the ideal resting place for
all devotees.
Shortly
afterwards Shyamananda arrived there and offered his obeisances to the feet of
his spiritual master, as well as the mahantas. Shri Hrdayananda Goswami asked
Shyamananda, “To whom is Duhki Krishnadas bowing?” “Prabhu,” Krishnadas said
with surprise, “I am bowing to your feet, as well as all the saintly persons
here.”
Hrdayananda replied curtly, “You are
not relating to me having the name and tilak given by me, why are you bowing to
others?” “Prabhu,” Shyamananda said, “By your mercy I have received thename
Shyamananda and this new tilak.”
“Listen
to me,” Goswami said, “Dreams cannot be accepted as a fact. Acting without my
approval you have become the servant of others and deceived me by sending a
false letter.” “But I have not deceived you,” Shyamananda protested,
“Everything written in the letter is true.”
“I shall wash off your tilak,” Goswami
said, “and see whether it spontaneously reappears on your forehead. I shall
wipe the name Shyamananda from your body and let us see if it again appears
written in the same place. If this
happens then you will receive my blessings, otherwise I shall reject you.”
Bowing to the feet of his guru,
requesting his permission, Shyamananda replied: “In the presence of all of you
I shall prove that this name and tilak is authorized. If I am unable to do so then I am guilty of a
very serious offense."
Hrdayananda Goswami then gathered all
the mahantas of Shri Vrajamandala under the kalpataru in the Rasasthali of Shri
Vrndavana. The mahantas took their seats and called Shyamananda before them.
Falling prostrate on the ground, Shyamananda offered his obeisances. “Who is
your guru,” the mahanatas asked, “And from where did you get your name?”
“Shri Hrdayananda Goswami is my master,”
Shyamananda said, “And I am his servant.” “Listen to us Krishnadas,” they
replied. “Dreams are always false. If
you are found guilty of this offense you will lose the association of devotees,
and the opportunity to attain salvation. If the Lord is angry with someone, his
guru can save him, but if his guru becomes angry with him, no one can save
him. Now tell the truth, and we shall
protect you. Don’t lie before all these
saintly persons. Otherwise, you will certainly suffer the miseries of hell for
as long as the sun and moon exist. This
is the infallible verdict of Vyasa in the Shrimad Bhagavatam. If you have secretly accepted another guru,
tell us about him. We shall be kind
enough to save you from this offense.
You will prove yourself to be an imposter if you lie about your name and
tilak.”
“Whether I am right or wrong I know
within my own mind,” Shyamananda replied.
“Please allow me one or two more days to think about my answer.”
Remembering his spiritual master, Shyamananda then sat down and became fully
absorbed in a blissful state of deep meditation. Chanting the mantra given to
him by Lalita, he felt the presence of Shri Radhika within his heart. His soul,
mind, life and knowledge entered into siddha (perfected) stage, and with his spiritual
body he entered the temple of Shri Radha. Sitting on thedoorstep of Her room he
began to cry. The sakhis of Shri Radha asked why he was crying. Bowing to them
Shyamananda explained, “I am a Vrajavasi named Kanaka-manjari. I am the
maidservant of Lalita. I spent the whole day and night with Thakurani, then
when I returned home and tried to enter my house my husband tried to beat me,
so I ran away in fear and came here. Go tell Lalita to save my life by giving
me her darshan.” Filled with anxiety he bowed again, crying helplessly.
The sakhis went to Lalita and
reported, “One maidservant of yours has come here crying in great
distress. Previously she stayed in your
house with you, then when she returned home her husband tried to beat her.” “Bring
her here,” Lalita ordered. “I am
preparing the betel-leaves now.”
One of the sakhis called her in and
Kanakamanjari found herself in the presence of Shri Radha. Radhika was sitting
on a cot eating betel leaves as Lalita prepared them. Shri Rupamanjari massaged Her legs, and
Champakalata fanned Her with a camara.
Overwhelmed with ecstatic love,
Kanakamanjari fell flat on the ground. Thakurani ordered the sakhis to lift her
and Lalita tookKanaka on her lap.
Holding the feet of Lalita she began to cry. Shri Radha affectionately called
Kanakamanjari and placed Her lotus feet on her head. Kanaka fell unconscious on the feet of Shri
Rupamanjari, who then pushed her under the lotus feet of Radha.
“Be kind to me Thakurani,” Kanaka
cried, “I am your maidservant. Give me shelter under your reddish feet.” “Why
are you crying so helplessly,” Radha
asked. “What is your name? Whom do you
serve? Where do you live, and who are
your parents?”
“My name is Kanakamanjari. I have always cherished the hope of receiving
the dust of your feet. I am a Vrajavasi,
and the maidservant of your maidservant, Shri Rupamanjari. She is my father, mother, master, and
caretaker. She has bestowed loving
devotion upon me, and by her mercy I received the darshan of Lalita. Now, by the grace of Lalita, I am able to see
Your lotus feet.”
“Oh supreme goddess, listen to my
story then you shall understand why I am crying. I am the disciple of Shri
Hrdayananda Goswami. Previously I carried the mark of his grace, in the form of
a tilak, on my forehead. By his merciful order I came to Vraja, where I stayed
with Jiva Goswami. Shri Jiva helped me immensely by explaining the wonderful
pastimes of Radha Krishna in Vraja. Tasting only a drop of Your nectarean
pastimes, my mind fell deep into the ocean of love. When I was thirsty for the
water of Your love, Shri Jiva helped me to drink the nectar. He advised me that
my ultimate goal should be to attain the grace of Your feet. For that reason he
put me under the care of the gracious feet of Shri Rupamanjari.”
“Relishing the sweetness of Your lotus
feet, I served the kunj daily. Although
I am the most helpless and worthless person, You bestowed Your kindness upon me
by intentionally dropping Your anklebell in the kunj. You sent Lalita to retrieve the ankle bell
and she mercifully appeared before me. She was so pleased to have found the
ankle bell that she blessed me saying that the mark of your anklebell should be
on my forehead. Touching the ankle bell
to my forehead a mark was permanently painted there. She told me, “My Shyama will be extremely
happy to get back the ankle bell, therefore from today, you shall be known as
Shyamananda.” She asked me what boon I would like and I requested to become the
maidservant of Radha Krishna. She agreed, but forbade me to tell anyone accept
Shri Jiva. Otherwise, she said, I would lose my life.”
“Still today I am carrying the mark on
my forehead and I have not told anyone, but seeing this mark my guru
misunderstood and thought that I had rejected him. He asked about my new name and tilak and I
said that he had appeared to me in a dream and changed my name and tilak. I explained that in the dream he had asked me
why I had not come to see him. I replied
that because I was fully engaged in serving the kunj, and absorbed in
rememberance of Shri Radha, I had not found time to meet him. Hearing this my
Prabhu became very happy and advised me to carry on with my duties. Bestowing his mercy upon me, he told me that
through serving Radha Krishna and the kunj I would certainly attain the darshan
of Shyama Shyam. Thus he gave me the
name Shyamananda. Blessing me he put his
foot on my head. After circumabulating
the kunj he entered into it and took his seat.”
“I told Goswami that the mark of his
lotus feet had become my tilak, but he did not believe it. He became very
angry, saying thatI had ignored my real name and tilak and followed a
dream. ‘I know nothing about this
dream,’ he said. ‘If you want to be my disciple accept my mark and tell
everyone that your name is Krishnadas and nothing else.’”
“I told Goswami to personally wipe the
tilak from my forehead and he replied, ‘I shall wash your tilak and see whether
it spontaneously reappears. I will also wipe off the name Shyamananda and see
whether it is spontaneously written again. Then your name will be acknowledged
and you will receive my mercy.’”
“Hearing this I accepted his order,
bowing to his feet. Goswami then told me, ‘I must prove your name and tilak to
all the mahantas, otherwise I shall commit suicide.’”
“Calling together all the mahantas
from Gauda and Vraja, Goswami formed a society in the Kalpakunj of the
Rasasthali in Vrndavana. They requested me to appear before them to prove the
truth. The mahantas strongly advised me
to speak truthfully, otherwise I would be cast out from the association of
devotees and suffer the miseries of hell.”
“I asked them to wait patiently and I
began meditating on Your lotus feet. In my meditation my mind and soul traveled
here. Now I have attained the great fortune of seeing Your lotus feet. I am
ignorant, worthless, and wicked but Your grace will help me to cross over this
ocean of birth and death. Oh Thakurani,
please be merciful to me, save me from the harassement of the mahantas. Show me how I can satisfy Your feet, as well
as the feet of my spiritual master. Now I have told you both the cause of my
crying and my desire.”
Lalita and Shri Rupamanjari both
requested Radharani to be merciful to Shyamananda. Holding the hands of
Kanakamanjari, Lalita pushed her on the feet of Radha, who mercifully placed
Her feet on the head of Kanaka.
Shri Radha called Subala Sakha and
told him everything: “Krishnadas, the servant of your servant, has taken refuge
under My feet. He always serves the kunj and has dedicated his life and soul to
Me. By your order I have accepted him.”
“It is my great fortune that one of my
servants has become Your maidservant,” Subala said. Even I am always desirous of becoming Your
maidservant.”
Hearing this Shri Radha was very
pleased and pushed Kanakamanjari on the feet of Subala. Kanaka bowed to his feet and Subala took her
in his lap. Blessing her Subala said,
“You are extremely fortunate as you have received the love of Radha Krishna and
become a favorite maidservant of Radha.”
Radha ordered Subala to give
Shyamananda the tilak and prove it before the society of mahantas. She also
requested him to write the name Shyamananda on the chest of Krishnadas, and to
tell the mahantast hat by his grace Krishnadas attained the mark of Shri
Radha’s feet as his tilak and the name Shyamananda, by which he should be known
in the world.
Subalachand happily painted the mark of
the feet of Shri Radha on Krishnadas’ forehead, placing a dot in the middle. He
wrote Shyamananda on the chest of Krishnadas and advised him to say everyday,
“Pandit Thakur, in the form of my guru has favoured me.”
“When you are asked to prove the
sanctity of the name and tilak,” Suvala said, “Just remember me and the name
and tilak will spontaneously appear on your body.” Hearing this Shyamananda
fell at the feet of Subala. Placing his feet on the head of Shyamananda, Subala
blessed him and took his leave.
After offering obeisances at the feet
of Shri Radha, Lalita,Visakha, Shri Rupamanjari, and the other sakhis,
Shyamananda stood before Shri Radha with folded hands. Drinking in the nectar of Her beautiful face,
he was unable to check the tears of ecstacy flowing from his eyes. Shyamananda humbly requested Radha to help
him to dedicate his life, body and soul to Her reddish lotus feet.
The image of love, Shri Radha, assured
him that he would always have Her blessings.
Radhika advised him to tour Orissa with Rasika Murari and afterwards return
to Vraja. Shyamananda then took his
leave and one of the sakhis accompanied him for some distance.
Meanwhile the mahantas in Vrndavana
were astonished to see Shyamananda’s body become lifeless. Doubts began to pierce their hearts and they
wondered if they had committed a great offense. Overcome with lamentation they
rolled on the ground crying.
Only Shri Jiva could understand what
had taken place. Consoling them Jiva suggested, “Everyone begin nama-sankirtan,
Shyamananda will certainly come to life again.”
The mahantas eagerly began chanting
the holy name: “Govinda, Shyamasundara, Kamala Lochana.”
After sometime Shyamananda regained
consciousness and sat up reciting the name of Shri Hrdayananda. Greatly
relieved the mahantas cheered loudly, chanting the name of Hari. When Shyamananda opened his eyes fully they
requested him to proclaim his verdict.
“It is my opinion,” Shyamananda
replied, “that Gauridas Pandit Thakur, in the form of my spiritual master, has
mercifully appeared before me in a dream. If I am a sincere servant of my
guru’s feet then I shall prove the sanctity of this name and tilak before your
eyes.”
The mahantas then painted the tilak
like the temple of Shri Hari on Shyamananda’s forehead, placing a dot in its
middle, and wrote the name Shyamananda on his chest. Praying to Shri Krishna Chaitanya to maintain
the prestige of His devotee, they requested Hrdayananda to preside over the
mahanta society and wash the tilak off with water. Goswami anxiously brought a
water pot, while Shyamananda happily called out to Shri Gauridas Pandit to come
and save his reputation. In the presence of everyone Shri Hrdayananda Goswami
washed off the tilak, as well as the name Shyamananda from his chest. Shyamananda loudly called to Shri Lalita
Thakurani to save him, and immediately the tilak and name spontaneously
reappeared in their proper places, even brighter than before. The mahantas were astonished, and Hrdayananda
hung his head in shame.
Holding the hands of Shyamananda the
mahantas joyfully called out the name of Hari. Some of them kissed and embraced
him, while others shouted the name Shyamananda.
Someone said that for the first time a dream has become reality, and
another said that Subalachanda has shown special mercy to Shyamananda, making him
his companion. Someone else said that Shyamananda has pleased Shyama (Radha)
and thus has attained this name.
Shyamananda offered his obeisances to
all the mahantas, and fell at the feet of Hrdayananda. Filled with joy Goswami
placed Shyamananda on his lap and lovingly kissed his face again and again.
Accepting Shyamananda as the best of his disciples he decided to keep his
precious association always.
The mahantas then took bath, cooked
and offered the food to Krishna. Meanwhile Shyamananda came before Shri Jiva
falling prostrate at his feet. Taking him on his lap Shri Jiva kissed
Shyamananda saying, “I dedicate myself to you, for you are not merely a
devotee, you are my life and my life has become a captive to your love.” Shri Jiva advised Shyamananda to stay with
Hrdayananda Goswami and serve his lotus feet.
Although I have no qualification, by
the mercy of the lotus feet of Shyamananda, I have received the ability to
write this book. Assisted by the rememberance of Shri Rupamanjari, I have
described the third chapter of Shri Shyamananda Prakash.
CHAPTER
4
By the mercy of the lotus feet of Shri
Shyamananda I continue writing this book. The next day Hrdayananda Goswami,
Shyamananda, and all the mahantas happily began a tour of all the forests (dvadasa-vanas
and upavanas) and kunjas of Vraja.
One day during their pilgrimage they
attended a festival of Rasa which was held at Sanketa. There they watched a
performance of the ecstatic loving pastimes of Radha Krishna and their sakhis.
Some of the sakhis sang sweetly and danced beautifully, while others played
various types of musical instruments.
As they watched the wonderful rasalila
the mahantas were filled with joy, and Shyamananda, overwhelmed with ecstatic
love, fell unconscious. Rolling on the ground he called out the name of Radha
Krishna, as floods of tears drenched his body.
Covering his head with a piece of cloth Shyamananda danced madly, crying
continuously.
Observing the transcendental emotions
displayed by Shyamananda, Shri Hrdayananda Goswami thought, “He is certainly a
maidservant of Radha. He will be of no use to me because he is not the
companion of my Krishna. Now I clearly
understand Shyamananda. He has given up
his own bhava and taken to Radha bhava.
How can I associate with him?” Thinking in this way Hrdayananda left the
Rasasthali feeling as if an arrow had pierced his heart. Shyamananda, however, remained at the
Rasasthali which infuriated Hrdayananda.
When the rasalila was finished
Shyamananda returned along with the mahantas.
Shyamananda slept in his own place and in the morning came for darshan
of his spiritual master. As he bowed to
the feet of hisguru, Hrdayanada burst out saying, “You have discarded Krishna
bhava and taken gopi bhava instead. Now
what is the necessity of your staying with me?”
Shyamananda humbly and sweetly
replied, “Pandit Thakur (Gauridas Pandit, spiritual master of Hrdayananda)
worships in Radha bhava, yet in this bhava he is always with Krishna helping
Radha Krishna to meet together. He is always engaged in the service of Radha
Krishna and enjoys Their darshan in the kunja.
This bhava also arises in me but I have not left you Prabhu. Subala Thakur was absorbed in Radha bhava in
the kunja and I gladly enjoyed it.
“That’s a lie,” Goswami said. “Pandit Thakur never told me anything about
this. You must behave like a sakha.
Don’t even think of accepting any other bhava.” “I cannot do this,” Shyamananda
quietly replied.
Hrdayananda was so enraged with this
reply that he beat Shyamananda with a stick, striking him again and again on
the hands, legs, and back until his flesh was cut. Bleeding profusely Shyamananda fell onthe
ground.
Seeing the pitiable condition of
Shyamananada, the mahantas angrily chastised Hrdayananda: “Oh Goswami! What are you doing? It is notgood that you
are beating Shyamananda. Previously you tried to destroy him and now you will
be responsible for his death. Why are
you behaving like this? All types of
bhavas can be attained through madhurya bhava.”
The mahantas consoled Shyamananda, who
told them, “I am not sorry, on the contrary I am glad because my spiritual
master has acknowledged me after such a long time. His beating is like scented
sandalwood paste to me. His chastisement
has cooled and soothed my body and mind.
Being satisfied with me, my spiritual master has finally accepted me as
his disciple. Don’t worry about me.”
Then turning to Hrdayananda he said, “Prabhu, please be merciful to me. I am an ignorant fool, as I disobeyed your
order.”
Singing the glories of Shyamananda the
mahantas took bath, cooked, and offered everything to Krishna. After taking prasadam they visited Sanketa
and the other kunjavanas then took rest in the kunj. That night Shri Chaitanya Mahaprabhu appeared
before Hrdayananda Goswami ina dream.
Hrdayananda bowed to the Lord’s feet, then looking up he saw that
Mahaprabhu’s white scarf was covered with blood. Severe wounds covered the flesh on His hands,
legs and back. Because the white scarf
was soaked with blood it stuck tightly to the Lord’s back.
“What has happened?” Goswami gasped in
horror. “What is this I’m seeing on Your
body?”
“By your mercy My clothes have been
soaked with blood,” Mahaprabhu said.
“You have beaten Shyamananda who is like My very self, thus all the
beatings have come upon me.”
Hrdayananda fell at the feet of
Chaitanya Maharabhu. Greatly lamenting he cried out, “Now there is no one in
the world who can save me from hell. I had no understanding of how dear
Shyamananda is to You. Oh! Padmapani,
have mercy upon me. I have committed
unforgiveable offenses. Now I shall
commit suicide by entering into fire.”
Mahaprabhu forgave Hrdayananda and
ordered him to perform twelve festivals.
Accepting the order of the Lord Hrdayananda fell prostrate at His
feet. Blessing him, Mahaprabhu placed
the dust of His lotus feet on Goswami’s head and disappeared. At last Hrdayananda came to his senses,
clearly understanding that dreams can be accepted as reality. He spent the rest of the night thinking
deeply.
In the morning he related the dream to
the mahantas, “Last night Mahaprabhu appeared to me in a dream. His body was covered with bleeding wounds
caused by the beating I inflicted upon Shyamananda. Mahaprabhu explained that
Shyamananda was like His very Self, thus the beatings had come upon Him. Lamenting for my sin, I fell at His feet
begging forgiveness. He ordered me to to
atone for my sins by performing twelve festivals. I accepted the order and fell
at His feet. Mahaprabhu placed His feet
on my head and blessed me to be a devotee of Krishna, then He disappeared. First I committed offenses to saintly
persons, then I offended the Supreme Lord Himself. Now, oh sages please save me.”
“Previously you did not accept dreams
to be reality”, the mahantas replied. “Please be merciful,” Goswami insisted,
“Allow me to perform twelve festivals."
Hearing this the mahantas kindly gave their consent.
Turning to Shyamananda Goswami said,
“You are most exallted because you have saved your guru from sin. From now on you are not my servant, you are
the life of all.” Saying this Goswami
took Shyamananda on his lap. Shyamananda
fell to the ground bowing to the feet of Hrdayananda. All the mahantas blessed Shyamananda and
happily shouted the names of Hari.
After discussing together they decided
to send Shyamanada first to Vraja. “Go to Vrndavana”, they said, “And make
arrangements for the forthcoming festivals. We shall return after visiting
Vraja.”
Bowing to the feet of Shri Hrdayananda
and the mahantas, Shyamananda took his leave and went to Vrndavana. After visiting the kunjavanas he entered into
Vrndavana proper where he met Shri Jiva Goswami. Shyamananda offered his
obeisances and informed him of all that had taken place. Filled with happiness Shri Jiva took
Shyamananda on his lap and blessed him heartily.
Shri Jiva began preparations for the
festivals by first offering things from his own store room. Then calling together all the Vrajavasis, he
requested that they help prepare for the upcoming festivals. When the
Vrajavasis came to know that the festivals were to be performed by Shyamananda
they happily assisted by donating huge quantities of all the necessities
required. Shri Jiva was able to collect
all the items needed for the festivals from Mathura and Vrajamandala.
After finishing their tour the
mahantas came to Vrndavana. Eager to begin the festivals Shyamananda humbly
requested Shri Jiva, “I know nothing about what to do. You must be the organiser of all the
festivals. You order me and I shall be
your servant.”
Taking up the responsibility Shri Jiva
instructed his servants to invite all the saintly persons of Vraja. The servants obeyed his order and the
festivities began on the second day of the full moon.
Numerous varieties of food namely; luchi,
puri, sweets, khira, sugar, and curds were stocked for the festivals. The organizers received so many donations
that a mountain was formed from the items collected.
All the cooked preparations tasted
just like nectar. Crowds of Vrajavasis
ate heartily and even carried food home with them. In this way the festivals
continued for fifteen days. On the day of the full moon the rasa festival of
Radha Krishna took place. Thus the twelve festivals were organised and
completed joyfully.
When all the guests had returned home,
Shyamananda came before Hrdayananda Goswami and bowed at his feet. “I own nothing”, he said, “Everything belongs
to you. Whatever I seem to possess is only
due to your mercy.” Saying this he fell
at the feet of his spiritual master and offered his obeisances.
Taking Shyamananda on his lap
Hrdayananda blessed him that he would attain devotion to the lotus feet of
Krishna. Shri Hrdayananda then took his
leave.
Shri Jiva came before all the mahantas
and bowed at their feet. They all
embraced Shri Jiva heartily, some of them took him on their laps and dedicated
Shyamananda to the grace of Shri Jiva.
Hearing this all the Vrajavasis, saints, and mahantas happily called out
the names of Hari.
Shri Jiva accomapnied the mahantas for
some distance as they began their journey home.
When it was time to bid farewell Shri Jiva, filled with sadness, fell on
the ground unconscious. The mahantas consoled him and Hrdayananda
blessed him, and they departed for Gauda.
Shyamananda returned to Vrndavana and
stayed with Shri Jiva. One day Jiva Goswami requested Shyamananda to go to
Orissa to preach and save the fallen condtioned souls there from the suffering
of hell, after fulfilling this responsiblity he could return to Vrndavana. He reminded Shyamananda that Shrimati
Radharani had also ordered him to go to Orissa and preach with the help of
Rasika Murari.
Accepting this order Shyamananda
turned over all his books and articles of worship to Shri Jiva and left for
Utkala where he met Rasika Murari. In the association of Rasika he was
empowered to preach and deliver the fallen souls. Shyamananda preached in Orissa for a long
time. He later returned to Vraja where he continued to live with Shri Jiva.
Taking the lotus feet of Shri
Shyamananda as my only resort and remembering the lotus feet of Shri
Rupamanjari, I have thus completed the episode of the fourth chapter.
In the fifth chapter the family life
of Shyamananda is discussed. The
previous four chapters have dealt with Shyamananda’s desire toattain the grace
of Krishna. The ninth chapter describes the perfection of Shyamananda’s
sadhana. And the last, or tenth chapter,
deals with the birth of the feeling of madhurya viraha (separation) within
Shyamananda. Who could possibly describe
the intense desire of Shyamananda by which he attained the opportunity of
personally serving Radha Krishna?
Shyamananda disappeared from this
world out of separation from Shri Jiva. In the tenth chapter Shyamananda
attains his spiritual form and begins to live happily with Shri
Rupamanjari. Shri Radha Krishna favoured
him and kept him in Their service. Kanakamanjari became a favorite of Lalita,
Shri Rupamanjari and all the sakhis.
I have described Shyamananda’s
attainment of the spiritual abode only in hints, as I have been ordered to do
so. I am the most unqualified and
ignornat person but due to the grace of Shri Shyamananda Goswami I have written
this book and presented it before all the devotees. Although I have no ability
to write, by the mercy of my spirtiual master this book has been completed.
THE EPISODE OF WRITING THIS
BOOK
Oh wise listeners! Hear how this book, Shyamananda Prakash, has
come into existence.
One day I met a saint who read the
book Bhaktirasamrita Sindhu to me. While listening a deep feeling of
indifference towards the material world (vairagya) took birth within me and the
desire to go to Vrndavana arose in my heart.
Previously I had never found the time to meditate upon the merciful
lotus feet of Krishna. My mind had
always been preoccupied with sinful activities.
My body, mind and life was filled with passion, anger, greed,
infatuation, pride, and mundane emotions.
Pride gave rise to vanity and jealousy.
Thus my life passed in vain. Not a scent of devotion to Krishna entered
my heart. Even in the sphere of family
life I was a failure. What was the use
of such a worthless life? Absorbed in
maintaining my wife and children all the golden opportunities of life passed me
by. Fully engaged in material activities I found no time to remember the lotus
feet of Govinda, or to perform any sadhana.
In this way my life passed uselessly and death was quickly approaching.
But after hearing Bhaktirasamrita
Sindhu from that saint I began to realise that the lotus feet of Krishna are
the only resort for all of mankind. I
decided to give up all material attachments and live inVraja. Although my heart ached to leave for
Vrndavana, the opportunity to go did not arise.
I became very disturbed and began meditating on Shyamananda Goswami.
Absorbed in this way I went to bed and fell asleep thinking of Shri Vrndavana
Dhama.
In my dream I met some sannyasis who
were going to Vraja and I traveled along with them. Arriving in Vraja I took darshan of the
Jamuna, and then went to the kunja of Shri Shyamananda Goswami. I washed my hands and feet and sat down in
the kunja. After some time Shri Shyamananda, having completed the
circumambulation of Vraja, returned to his kunja, and all the devotees there
fell at his feet. They washed his feet and happily drank the water. I asked one vairagi who the Goswami was and
he replied , “This is Shyamananda Goswami”.
Hearing his name I shed tears of love.
Noticing me, Goswami called me before him and I fell flat offering
obeisances.
“Where do you come from,” he asked,
“What is your name, whom do you serve, and how many devotees are with you?”
“I am Krishnacarana dasa”, I said.
Please be merciful and allow me to serve you. I came to Vrndavana with four vairagis who
have gone fora tour of Vrndavana. I use
to live in Orissa with my wife, but she became a burden to me so I left her and
came alone to Vrndavana."
“Your wife must be in a state of
depression,” Goswami replied. “Who will
look after your son? Why have you given
up material life and become a vairagi?”
“Prabhu, My wife is also very
indifferent to family life”, I explained.
Out of love for Krishna I have come to Vraja.”
“Do not leave your wife,” Prabhu
said. “Return to your home and perform
the sadhana of Krishna, along with your wife.
What type of sadhana are you doing by leaving a helpless vaisnavi?”
I humbly explained to Prabhu, “I know
nothing about sadhana or smarana worship.
I have come to you because I have not understood Krishna yet, please be
kind and fulfill my desire.”
“You will obtain my mercy, as well as
the mercy of Radha Krishna, if you obey my order. Now go back to your house and engage, along
with your wife, in worshipping Krishna and singing my glories. Write something about my auspicious
activities and sing the praises of my devotees.”
“But I know nothing about your
eulogies,” I protested. “I know only the
letters but I do not know their meanings. How can I describe your glories?”
“Due to my wish you will be able to
understand everything”, Prabhu said. “If
you remember me everything will become clear to you.”
“I am an illiterate and ignorant
person”, I said. “What can I write? And
even if I write, what intelligent man will accept it?”
“My fame is known throughout the three
worlds”, Prabhu replied. Anyone who does not accept it is guilty of flouting
Shri Chaitanya. These words cannot be false.
After completing the book you should show it to my disciple,
Nayananda. He will be very happy to
receive a book about me. Out of love for
me he will distribute the book. Since the people have confidence in Nayananda
they will gladly accept the book. He who
sings the glories of Krishna and of myself will attain salvation. He will also get my association as well as
the feet of Krishna. Don’t hesitate to
write this book.”
Hearing this I fell prostrate on the
ground at the feet of Goswami. He placed his feet on my head and blessed me to
attain devotion to Krishna. He went to
his kunja and I returned home.
Just then I awoke from my dream, but
everything remained crystal clear in my mind.
I contemplated my good fortune in having the darshan of Vrndavana in my
dream. For a few days I hesitated to
carry out the order I had received. Then
again my Prabhu mercifully appeared before me in my sleep. He sat at my head and said, “You have flouted
my order. This will only bring harm to
you. I was sorry to see your distressed
condition so I came here to save you from sin.
Begin the work of writing a book in my name and remember that I am
always with you. Go take your bath and
start the book after worshipping Radha Krishna.”
Obeying his order I began writing,
meditating on my spiritual master. In this way by the desire and mercy of my
guru I received the ability to write this book, otherwise it was not possible.
I fall flat at the feet of Shri
Shyamananda Goswami offering my obeisances millions of times. If there is any mistakes in my writing or any
incidence of rasabhasa I humbly beg forgiveness. It is impossible for a
worthless person like myself to fully describe the glorious qualities of Shri
Shyamananda.
I hold the feet of Shri Chaitanya and
Nityananda and all the devotees on my head.
I have sold my head at the feet of Shri Radhamohana, the bestower of
love and devotion. Taking the lotus fet
of Shyamananda prabhu in my heart I, Krishnadasa, have compiled this book Shri
Shyamananda Prakash.