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12 Shridhara Kholavecha
All glories to Shri Kholaveca Shridhara Thakura, who is full of
compassion and tenderness. His bananas and radishes were eaten by the Lord
Himself, Shri Shri Gauranga Raya. He is Kusumasva cowherd boy in Vraja. More »«
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Kholaveca Shridhara Thakura lived just on the border of Nadia
(Mayapur). He maintained himself by selling bananas, vegetables, banana leaves
and cups. Whatever little income he had, fifty percent went for worship of
Mother Ganges, and with the rest he somehow or other maintained himself.
Towards the end of night, during the early morning hours (brahma muhurta) he
would loudly chant Hari Nama. His atheistic hindu neighbours, devoid of
devotion, couldn't tolerate this, and they used to berate him with abusive
language: "This clumsy, boorish knave couldn't get enough rice to fill his
belly, but it is we who have to suffer, as he keeps us awake by his loud
moaning in hunger." [C.B.Madhya 9.148]
Shridhara, however, didn't bother with their ranting and raving.
Rather, in great happiness, he simply carried out his own business service. In
the bazaar at Bamonpukkur he had a store. He was extremely honest and asked a
fair price for his banana leaves and vegetables. He didn't like to haggle over
the prices, so he simply asked a fair price to begin with. Thus saving valuable
time and energy, he used it to remember the Holy Names.
He didn't like to waste time speaking so much. The customers would
simply hand him the correct price and take their goods in exchange. Whatever
money he got from selling the various parts of the banana plant, bananas and
radishes, he would use half for purchasing flowers and sweets for worship of
Mother Ganges. Whatever remained he used for maintaining his household.
Sometimes, as instructed by His mother, Lord Gaurasundara would
come to the bazaar to purchase bananas, radishes and spinach. He used to barter
with Shridhara all the while cutting jokes. Shridhara would sell his goods at a
fixed price, so Shri Gaurasundara would offer half that much. Then Shridhar
would get up and try to snatch away the vegetables from Shri Gaurasundara's
hands. But He wouldn't let go. Finally it would end up that the two of them
would be pulling the vegetables back and forth. Then many people would crowd
around to see the fun.
One day Mahaprabhu was haggling over the price of a banana flower
with Shridhara. When Shridhara tried to snatch back the banana flower,
Mahaprabhu chide, "Why do you behave like this, My dear brother Shridhara?
Some think that you are renunciant, but I know that you have so much hidden
wealth. You are trying to snatch these things out of My hand, but after so many
days, you still don't know who I am? I am the father of the Ganges whom you
worship. I am only telling you the truth." [C.B. Mad 9.173]
"Shridhara then cried "Vishnu! Vishnu!" and put his
hands over his ears. Hearing Nimai Pandita's seeming blasphemy, he thought that
perhaps He had gone crazy. But Shridhara then reflected upon Shri
Gaurasundara's character very carefully. "Gauranga-sundara's form is
beautiful enough to bewilder cupid himself
(madana-mohana-rupa-Gauranga-sundara). The beautiful tilaka on His forehead
steals one's mind away. His dhoti looks very beautiful tied in three places,
and His hair is very wavy.
Two things are very restless: His nature and His eyes. The white
brahman thread encircling His body looks so beautiful, as though a subtle form
of Ananta is residing on His body. His lips red from chewing pan, He laughs and
looks at Shridhara. And again He takes some bananas, picking them up
Himself." [C.B. Mad 9.169-172]
As they conversed, Shri Gaurasundara played with the bananas,
setting them back down on the ground and then, laughing, picking them up again.
Shridhara then said, "Please listen to me, Thakura! I am Your dog, so
kindly forgive me. You don't have to pay anything. Take it for free!"
Mahaprabhu replied, "You are very clever, Shridhara! By
selling bananas you have become quite wealthy." Then Shridhara, as if to
get rid of Him, asked, "My dear Thakura, are there no other stores in this
bazaar?" "There are so many, but what is that to Me? You are My
regular supplier! Why should I give you up?" "Yes, yes, dear Thakura,
now I fall at Your feet. I am defeated by You.
From today, I will give You what You want. You can take things for
free."
"But you'll just give Me old, rotten things!"
"Dear Thakura, why should I give you bad vegetables?"
"Then it's all right. Very well, that sounds good."
After disputing in this way for a while, Mahaprabhu went home.
Shridhara sat transfixed, gazing after Him. "Someday this boy will be a
great liberated soul. How sweetly He speaks and what wonderful expressions He
makes! Though He behaves with me in such a ticklish manner, still I feel no
remorse in my mind. He doesn't go to any other shop in the market but comes
only to me. I am so fortunate!"
Every day Shri Gaurasundara used to eat vegetable preparations of
Shridhara's banana stalks and banana flowers from his banana leaf plates and
cups.
"The Lord eats what is offered by His devotees. He doesn't
even look at what may be offered by nondevotees even though there may be ten
million varieties of preparations." [C.B. 9.185] Every day, Shri
Gaurasundara would go for walks and wander throughout the town with His
disciples. One day He came to Shridhara's house. Shridhara knew the Lord very
well, having seen Him so many times in the marketplace. Though He did not cut
jokes today, Gaurasundara would not leave Shridhara's place. Shridhara offered
Shri Gaursundara a seat. Sitting down, Shri Gaurahari told Shridhara, "All
day you chant 'Hari, Hari'. You worship Shri Shri Laksmi-Narayana as well. But
how is it you are so poor? You have so little to eat and your clothes are so
meager!"
"But Thakura, though I may eat little I am not fasting, and
as for my clothes, whether they are few or many, still I wear something."
"My dear Shridhara, you may indeed be wearing some cloth, but
I see that it is patched in at least ten places. And though you live in a
house, there is no thatching on the roof. Just see, the people of Navadwipa
worship Goddess Candi and Durga. They get so much material happiness from this,
isn't that so?"
"You have spoken correctly, dear Thakura. Still, everyone's
days are passing the same. The king lives in a jewelled palace and eats dainty
foodstuffs and wears the most excellent apparel. And the birds simply live in
the treetops. But tomorrow they will become equals, because everyone has to
reap the results of his own activities according to the will of the Lord."
[C.B. Adi 12.189-190]
Then Mahaprabhu began to joke again. "Shridhara! I know you
have so much wealth, but you are simply hiding it! I am going to tell everyone!
I see how you cheat the people!"
"Thakura! You should go home now! I don't want to quarrel
with You." "Just one more thing, Shridhara. Whatever you want to give
Me, please
bring it now. Unless you give me something, I cannot leave
here"
"Look, Pandita! I am a poor man. By selling banana stalks and
bananas, I am not even able to feed myself properly. I just don't have anything
suitable to give You."
"All right, let your buried riches remain hidden. For now,
just give Me some banana stalks, bananas and banana flowers."
Shridhara thought to himself, "This brahmana youngster might
be somewhat touched in the head. If I answer back too much He might even beat
me. And, because He is the son of a brahmana, if He beats me, I won't be able
to retaliate. Then again, I can't afford to give vegetables and bananas away to
Him for free everyday. Yet again, because He is a brahmana and thus an
expansion of the Lord, whatever service I can render to Him is actually my
great fortune."
Then he spoke. "You don't have to pay me anything today,
Thakura. Here, take these bananas, banana stalks and banana flowers! But don't
quarrel with me anymore."
"If you give away nice things, my dear Shridhara, who can
quarrel with you? But give nice ones. Don't give a blind cow in charity to a
brahmana!"
Thus having again enjoyed some joking words with Shridhara, Shri
Gaurasundara, along with His disciples, got ready to set out for His house.
Just as He was about to leave, he again asked Shrid?hara, "What do you
think of Me? If you tell Me truthfully, then I'll go."
"You are the son of a brahmana. An expansion of Vishnu."
"Shridhara! I'm surprised you still don't know who I am! I am
a cowherd boy! The glories of your Mother Ganges are also due to Me."
"You don't even respect Mother Ganges! As people get older,
they become subdued and temperate, but at Your age You are getting more and
more restless. Now You had better go home. Don't fight with me anymore."
Hearing Shridhara's parting words, Shri Gaurasundara laughed and
went home. For as long as the Lord chooses not to reveal Himself, no one can
recognize Him.
For a few more days, Shri Gaurasundara continued with His daily
pastimes of learning and education. But then He went to Gayadhama where His
mood radically changed. By the time He returned home He was completely
intoxicated with love for Krishna. He was now intensely absorbed in the moods
of transcendence; the courtyard of Shrivasa Pandita's house was the principal
place where these manifestations of divine rapture blossomed forth with the
outpouring of His heart. It is not possible to describe the ecstatic
transformations which occured in His person. They gradually increased with the
passage of day to night and night to day.
One day, Mahaprabhu decided to reveal His true self, and sitting
on the throne of Lord Vishnu within Shrivasa Pandit's temple, He began to
display His divine potencies. At that time He called His devotees, one after
another.
"Bring Shridhara here! Let him see My divine form. He has
executed so many penances and austerities and tolerated so much trouble in
order to have My darsana."
Though it was the middle of the night, as the devotees approached
Shridhara's house, they could hear him chanting the Holy Names. As they
arrived, they called out, "Shridhara! Shridhara!" But he was so much
absorbed in loudly chanting the Holy Names of Hari that at first he didn't hear
them. After a little while he became conscious of their presence and coming out
of his house he saw their shining faces in the moonlight. "What brings you
here in the middle of the night?"
"Shridhara! Hurry up! Mahaprabhu is calling you. He sent us
to bring you!" Simply hearing mention of Mahaprabhu, Shridhara fainted to
the ground in a swoon of ecstatic love." [C.B. Mad 9.154]
The devotees picked him up and brought him to see Mahaprabhu.
Seeing His dear devotee, Mahaprabhu called out, "Shridhara! Come here,
come here! In order to get a glimpse of Me, you have performed so much worship
in so many births, and in this life as well you have served Me so much. With great
satisfaction have I tasted your vegetables, bananas and banana flowers, eaten
with rice from your banana leaves. Shridhara, have you forgotten all this?!
Shridhara! Just get up and see My divine form. This form even the personified
Vedas are not qualified to see."
Shridhara very slowly got up and began to gaze at the divine form
of the Lord.
Tamal Shyamal dekhe sei Vishwambhar
Hate Mohan bansi dakkhine Balaram
Mahajyotirmoy sab dekhe vidyaman
Kamala tambul dei hater upare
catur mukh pancamukh age stoti kore
[C.B. Mad 9.190]
"He saw his Lord Visvambhara, but with a bluish bodily
complexion, holding in His hand the flute and accompanied by Balarama standing
on His right. Emanating from the Lord and His associates he saw an effulgence
illuminating the temple. The goddess of fortune was handing Him betel and pan
leaves, while Lord Brahma and Lord Siva continued to recite hymns."
Seeing his Lord Gaurasundara in His form of Syamasundara,
Shridhara again fell to the ground in a swoon of love of God. By His touch,
Mahaprabhu brought him back to consciousness and told him to offer hymns in
praise of Himself. Shridhara replied, "Thakura! I don't know
anything."
"My dear Shridhara, whatever you say will be a hymn in praise
of Me and I bless you that the goddess of learning, Mother Sarasvati, be
present on your tongue."
Then Shridhara proclaimed, "Jaya jaya Mahaprabhu, jaya
Visvambhara, (the Maintainer of the universe). Jaya jaya Navadvipa Purandara
(Who is full with all beauty). Jaya jaya ananta brahmanda kotinatha (the Lord
of tens of millions of universes) Jaya jaya saci punyavati garbhajata (Who took
birth from the womb of the pious and chaste Saci).
Jaya jaya Vedagopya jaya dvijaraja (Who is hidden within the Vedas
and is the Lord of the brahmanas). Yuge yuge dharma pal kari nana saja (Who
comes in various forms to uphold religions during the different ages). [C.B.
Mad 9.200-202]
In this way Shridhar offered prayers for almost an hour and a
half. Being very pleased, Mahaprabhu told him, "Now ask any benediction
from Me."
"Thakura, I don't want any benediction. But if You want to
bless me someway then this is my request:
Se brahman kari nilo mor kholapat
Se brahman hauk mor janma janma nath
Se brahman mor sange karilo kondol
Mor Prabhu hauk tar caran yugal [C.B. Mad 9/224]
"That brahmana who snatched away my banana leaves and cups,
may He be my Lord birth after birth. That brahmana Who would wrangle with me
over the price of my bananas, may His lotus feet always be my object of
worship."
Having requested this blessing, Shridhara began to cry very
loudly.
Seeing his tears of love, the devotees also began to cry.
Mahaprabhu replied, "You, Shridhara, are My servant birth after birth. I
have tested you in so many ways, but I am extremely pleased with your conduct.
I have become indebted to you by your service and love for Me."
Hearing these loving words from Mahaprabhu the devotees made the
sky reverberate with the sounds of "Hari! Hari!" "Neither
wealth, followers or scholarship do they desire. Who can understand these
servants of Shri Chaitanya? What is the effect of learning, wealth, beauty,
fame and aristocratic birth, other than to simply increase one's false ego and
thus bring about one's end. What Shridhar gained, simply by selling bananas and
radishes, is unatainable by the richest of men in tens of millions of
ages." [C.B. Mad 9.283-235]
After performing various pastimes with His devotees in
Nadianagara, the Lord then desired to perform the pastime of accepting sannyasa
in order to deliver all the living entities. The day before His departure He
passed in ecstatic dancing and chanting of the Holy Names, and in the evening
returned to His house. The devotees accompanied Him there.
"Today how unprecedentedly beautiful Prabhu looks! Smiling so
sweetly He is presenting His flower garlands to His various devotees, who are
floating in oceans of bliss. Advaita Acarya is here, Shrivasa Pandit and Shri
Vakresvara Pandit, and here comes Shridhara with a bottle gourd in his hand, to
offer to Mahaprabhu."
Taking the gourd in His hand Mahaprabhu began to laugh. He thought
to Himself, "How will I go to take sannyasa without first eating
Shridhara's bottle gourd? I can't refuse the offerings of My devotees."
He called His mother - "Ai! Shridhara has taken the trouble
to bring this gourd! Cook it and offer it to Krishna."
Just at that time another devotee brought some milk. So Saci Mata
prepared halavah from the gourd and milk and after offering to the Deity she
brought it before her son. While feeding His devotees He honoured the prasada
Himself also.
"Shridhara! How can I refuse what you have brought for Me?
But tell Me if you will honor My request."
"Thakura! Just say whatever it is. Why shouldn't I be able to
keep Your request?" "Then please come here to My house every day so
that I can see you."
After enjoying some joking words with His devotees He instructed
them to always engage in Shri Krishna sankirtana. Then He prepared to take
rest. In the dead of night He left to accept sannyasa. When He resided at Puri,
Shridhara used to come every year with the other Bengali devotees to see Him.