NITAAI-Veda.nyf > All Scriptures By Acharyas > Bhaktivinoda Thakura > Sharanagati > Atma Nivedana |
(Atma-nivedana,
dedication of the self, 8 songs)
(1) 1.na korolun karama,
geyana nahi bhelo,
na sebilun carana tohara
jada-sukhe matiya, apanaku banca-i,
pekhahun caudisa andhiyara
2.tuhun natha!
karuna-nidana
tuwa pada-pankaje atma samarpilun,
more krpa korobi bidhana
3.pratijna tohara oi, jo hi saranagata,
nahi so janabo paramada
so hama duskrti, gati nahi oi ana,
ab magon tuwa parasada
4.ana mano-ratha, nihsesa
chorato,
kab hama haubun tohara
nitya-sebya tuhun, nitya-sebak mui,
bhakativinoda bhava sara
Translation
I have earned neither
piety nor knowledge. Overwhelmed by sensual pleasures, I have cheated myself
and now see only darkness in all directions.
You, O Lord, are the
fountainhead of all mercy. I surrender myself at Your lotus feet. Kindly show
me Your compassion.
It is Your promise that
one who takes refuge in You will know no dangers or fear. For a sinner like me
there is no other shelter. I beg You now for infinite grace.
O when will I know
freedom from desire and thus become Yours? You are eternally to be served, I am
Your eternal servant, and that is the sum of Bhaktivinoda’s devotional mood.
(2) 1.(praneswar!)
kohabun ki sarama ki bat
aichana pap nahi, jo hama na koralun,
sahasra sahasra beri nath
2.sohi karama-fala bhave
moke pesa-i,
dokha deobo ab kahi
takhonaka parinam, kichu na bicaralun
ab pachu tara-ite cahi
3.dokha bicara-i, tunhu
danda deobi,
hama bhoga korabun somsara
karato gatagati, bhakata-jana-sange,
bati rohu carane tohara
4. apana caturpana, tuwa
pade sonpalun,
hrdoya-garaba dure gelo
dina-doya-moya tuwa krpa niramala,
bhakativinoda asa bhelo
Translation
How much more shall I
tell You of my shameful story? There is no sin which I have not committed
thousands and thousands of times.
My life in this world has
been one of affliction and torment as a result of those sins. Whom will I blame
but myself? At the time I did not consider the consequences; now, in the
aftermath, I seek to be saved.
After judging my sins,
You should punish me, for I deserve to suffer the pangs of rebirth in this
world. I only pray that, as I wander through repeated births and deaths, my
mind may ever dwell at Your lotus feet in the company of Vaishnavas.
I offer You this
judicious prayer. My heart’s false pride has gone far away. O You who are so
kind to the meek, Your pure mercy has become Bhaktivinoda’s only hope.
(3) manasa, deho, geho,
jo kichu mor
arpilu tuwa pade, nanda-kisor!
sampade vipade,
jivane-marane
day mama gela, tuwa
o-pada barane
marobi rakhobi - jo iccha
tohara
nitya-dasa prati tuwa
adhikara
janma obi moe iccha jadi
tohar
bhakta-grhe jani janma
hau mora
kita-janma hau jatha tuwa
dasa
bahir-mukha brahma-janme
nahi asa
bhukti-mukti-sprha vihina
je bhakta
labhaite tako sanga
anurakta
janaka, janani, dayita,
tanaya
prabhu, guru, pati--tuhu
sarva-moya
bhakativinoda kohe, suno
kana!
radha-natha! tuhu hamara
parana
Translation
Mind, body, and family,
whatever may be mine, I have surrendered at Your lotus feet, O youthful son of
Nanda!
In good fortune or in
bad, in life or at death, all my difficulties have disappeared by choosing
those feet of Yours as my only shelter.
Slay me or protect me as
You wish, for You are the master of Your eternal servant.
If it is Your will that I
be born again, then may it be in the home of Your devotee.
May I be born again even
as a worm, so long as I may remain Your devotee. I have no desire to be born as
a Brahma averse to You.
I yearn for the company
of that devotee who is completely devoid of all desire for worldly enjoyment or
liberation.
Father, mother, lover,
son, Lord, preceptor, and husband; You are everything to me.
Thakura Bhaktivinoda says,
"O Kana, please hear me! O Lord of Radha, You are my life and soul!"
(4) 1.‘aham mama’ —
sabda-arthe jaha kichu hoy
arpilun, tomara pade, ohe doya moy!
2.‘amara’ ami to’ natha!
na rohinu ara
ekhona hoinu ami kebala tomar
3.‘ami’ sabde dehi jiba ahamta
charilo
twadiyabhimana aji hrdoye posilo
4.amar sarbaswa — deho,
geho anucara
bhai, bandhu, dara, suta, drabya, dwara,
ghara
5.se saba hoilo taba, ami
hoinu dasa
tomara grhete ebe ami kori basa
6.tumi grha-swami, ami
sebaka tomara
tomara sukhete cesta ekhona amara
7.sthula-linga-dehe mor
sukrita duskrita
ar mor nahe, prabhu! Ami to’nrskrita
8.tomar ichayaya mor
ichaya misaila
Bhakativinoda aja apane bhulilo
Translation
Whatever I am, whatever I
possess, I offer at Your lotus feet, O merciful Lord.
I no longer belong to
myself. Now I am exclusively Yours.
The soul inhabiting this
mortal body has given up the false ego attached to the word “I”, and now the
eternal, spiritual sense of being Yours has entered his heart.
All my possessions -
body, brothers, friends, and followers, wife, sons, personal belongings, house
and home- all of these I give You, for I have become Your servant. Now I dwell
in Your house.
You are the Lord of my
house, and I Your most obedient servant.. Your happiness is my only endeavor
now.
Whatever piety or sins
were done by me, by mind or deed, are no longer mine, for I am redeemed
My desire has become one
with Yours. From this day Bhaktivinoda has no other identity.
(5) 1.‘amara’ bolite
prabhu! are kichu nai
tumi-i amara matro pita-bandhu-bhai
2.bandhu, dara, suta,
suta — taba dasi dasa
sei to’ sambandhe sabe amara prayasa
3.dhana, jana, grha, dara
‘tomara’ boliya
rakha kori ami matro sebaka hoiya
4.tomara karjera
tareuparjibo dhana
tomara somsare-byaya koribo bahana
5.bhalo-manda nahi jani
seba matro kori
tomara samsare ami bisaya-prahari
6.tomara icchaya mora
indriya-calana
srabana, darsana, ghrana, bhojana-basana
7.nija-sukha lagi’ kichu
nahi kori ara
bhakativinoda bale, taba suka-sara
Translation
Nothing remains “mine”.
Father, friend, brother — You are even these to me.
Those whom I called
friends, wife, sons, and daughters are all Your servants and maidservants.
Whatever care I take for them is only as it relates to You.
If I continue to maintain
my wealth, family members, home, and wife, it is because they are Yours. I am a
mere servant.
For Your service I will
earn money and bear the expense of Your houselhold.
I know neither good nor
bad. I merely serve. I am but a watchman who guards the properties in Your
household.
The exercising of my
senses — hearing, seenig, smelling, tasting, touching — is done according to
Your desire.
I no longer do anything
for my own pleasure. Bhakativinoda says, “Your happiness is the essence of
everything”.
(6) 1. bastutoh sakali
taba, jiba keho noya
‘aham’ — ‘mama’ — bhrame bhromi’ bhoge
soka-bhoy
2.aham-mama-abhimana
ei-matro dhana
baddha jiba nija boli’ jane mane mana
3.sei abhimane ami
somsare poriya
habudubu khai bhava-sindhu santariya
4.tomara abhaya-pade
loiya sarana
aji ami korilama atma-nibedana
5.‘aham’ —
‘mama’-abhimana charilo amaya
ar jeno mama hrde stana nahi paya
6. ei matro balo prabhu!
dibe he amare
ahamta-mamata dure pari rakhi bare
7. atma-nibedana-bhava
hrde drdha roy
hasti-snana sama jeno khanika na hoy
8. bhakativinoda prabhu
nityananda pay
mage parasada, jahe abhimana jay
Translation
In truth, all things
belong to You. NO jiva is owner of anything. The tiny soul wanders in this world mistakenly thinking, “I am this
transitory body, and everything related to this body is mine.” Thus he suffers
sorrow and fear.
The conditined soul is
falsely proud and considers everything attached to the words “I” and “mine” to
be his treasures alone.
Due to that same vanity,
I fell into this world. Floundering in the ocean of mundane existence like a
drowning man, I suffer the pangs of rising and sinking in that ocean.
I take shelter at Your
lotus feet, which award fearlessness, and dedicate myself to You on this day.
The vanity of “I” and
“mine” has left me now. May it never again find a place within my heart.
O Lord, please give me
this strength, that I may be able to keep the false conceptions of “I” and “Mine” far away.
May the mood of
self-surrender to the Supreme Lord remain firmly fixed in my heart and not
prove to be like the momentary cleanliness of an elephant after a bath.
Bhaktivinoda begs at the
lotus feet of Lord Nityananda for the grace which delivers one from all false
pride.
(7) 1.nibedana kori
prabhu! tomara carane
patita adhama ami, jane tri-bhuvane
2.ama-sama papi nahi
jagat -bhitore
mama sama aparadhi nahika somsare
3.sei saba papa ara
aparadha, ami
parihare pai lajja, saba jano’ tumi
4.tumi bina ka’ra ami
loibo saran?
tumi sarbeswareswara, brajendra-nandan!
5.jagat tomara natha!
tumi sarba-moy
toma prati aparadha tumi koro’ khoy
6. tumi to’ skhalita-pada
janera asroy
tumi bina ara kiba ache, doya-moy!
7.sei-rupa taba aparadhi
jana jato
tomara saranagata hoibe satato
8. bhakativinoda ebe
loiya saran
tuwa pade kare aj atma-samarpan
Translation
I submit at Your lotus
feet, O Lord, that I am fallen and wretched, a fact known to the three worlds.
There is no sinner more
sinful than me. In the entire material creation there is no offender whose
offenses equal mine.
By attempting to clear
myself of all these sins and offenses I am put to shame and beg Your
forgiveness. All this is understood by You.
Of whom will I take
shelter except for You? O son of the King of Vraja, You are the Lord of all
lords.
This world is Yours, and
You pervade all things in it. You forgive the offenses committed against You.
You alone are the shelter
of those who have gone astray. Apart from You, what else exists, O merciful
Lord?
Those like me who have
offended You will know no peace until achieving Your shelter.
Bhaktivinoda takes
shelter in You and surrenders himself at Your lotus feet on this very day.
(8) 1.atma-nibedana,
tuwa-pade kori’
hoinu parama sukhi
duhkha dure gelo, cinta na rohilo,
caudike ananda dekhi
2.asoka-abhaya,
amrita-adhara,
tomara carana-dwaya
tahate ekhona, bisrama labhiya
charinu bhavera bhoya
3.tomara somsare, koribo
sebana,
nahibo falera bhagi
taba sukha jahe, koribo jatana,
ho ‘ye pade anuragi
4.tomara sebaya, duhkha
hoya jato,
sei ‘to parama sukha
seba-sukha-duhkha, parama sampada
nasaye abidya-duhkha
5.purba itihasa, bhulinu
sakala,
seba-sukha
pe’ye mane
ami to’tomara, tumi to ‘amara,
ki kaja apare dhane
6.bhakativinoda, anande
dubiya,
tomara sebara tare
saba cesta kare, taba iccha-mato,
thakiya tomara ghare
Translation
I have become supremely
joyful by surrendering myself at Your holy feet. Unhappiness has gone away, and
there are no more anxieties. I see joy in all directions.
Your two lotus feet are
reservoirs of immortal nectar where one may live free from sorrow and fear. I
have found peace there now and have given up the fear of worldly existence.
I shall render service in
Your household and not endeavor to enjoy the fruits of that service, but rather
I shall strive for whatever pleases You, fully devoted to Your lotus feet.
Troubles encountered in
Your service shall be the cause of great happiness, for in Your devotional
service joy and sorrow are equally great riches. Both destroy the misery of
ignorance.
I have completely
forgotten all past history by feeling great joy in my mind. I am most certainly
Yours, and You are indeed mine. What need is there of any other treasure?
Bhaktivinoda, diving into
the ocean of bliss, devotes all his efforts for Your service and dwells in Your
house according to Your wishes.